This has happened before. I get a little lost on my journey, a little disoriented, and then I see that months have gone by without writing a post. Not good, my friend. Hmmmm. Bilbo’s words come to mind …
“It’s a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step on to the road, and if you don’t keep your feet, there is no knowing where you might be swept off to.”
Part of this relational disconnect has to do with memories from being in the trenches with homeless addicts in recovery (some were serious about their recovery, and some were posers). The stories and shadows are paradoxically haunting: the tragedy of that world is a given; yet, at times there is something illogically peaceful in the midst of personal chaos … with the exception, of course, of the bad people. What I was thinking of, when I acknowledged that I have been delayed in contributing a post, when I used the words “relational disconnect” from being in the trenches (17 years) with homeless addicts in recovery, was that when I was finished working I wanted to keep going west on I-70 up into the mountains, instead of getting off at my exit that would take me home … I wanted to be somewhere, alone, and sit by a fire, either in an old cabin … or in an old forest. But I could never do that. I could never escape. I always tried to”do the next thing”.
I’m a bit preoccupied with the cold, at the moment. For about 3 days, it’s been so cold. Last night it was 18. During the day, going to my car, my thoughts froze up. Fortunately someone came along and guided me to a warm place. Now I am thinking again … I think.